DATING.
I figure, in ten years when I'm married with children, (and at times I'm sure I'll yearn for my single days, just a little bit), I better document these funny experiences to give me some laughs later on down the road.
Well folks. These days I am striking out in the love department.
Not looking for sympathy or words of encouragement, just want to make light of it!
Exhibit A:
Just picture it now. I head out to a Glendale party with my girls to meet all the boys in Medical and Dental School hoping to score me a good one! It's a black and white themed party, so of course we are rolling in the appropriate fashion. As I'm walking down the stairs, carefully paying attention to each step so I don't twist my ankle, the guy that I have been eyeing a little bit compliments me on my shoes in a very straight man kind of way.
We talk for probably an hour. About a wide variety of things. He's funny, so I'm laughing. We have a great time.
He gets my number. (Smart boy.)
He uses my number that night and texts me. (Yet again, being a smart boy.)
Adds me on Facebook. (He is three for three right now.)
Texts back and forth a little about a fun conversation we have about Lucky Charms.
A few days later - asks me out for Friday! (YES this is looking promising!) I'm excited, looking forward to it. AND I don't get excited about dates too often.
and THEN. Texts me the morning of to cancel because "he's sick" and says we'll reschedule.
Feeds me all sorts of lines about how he'll come to church on Sunday. Or reschedule and make it up to me.
Yep, you guessed it - The dude never rescheduled.
And for the first time in a long time, I was a little bit bummed. That doesn't happen very often!
Exhibit B:
You betcha! I went on the Mormon Bachelor!
My friend Aubrey found her husband by being the Mormon Bachelorette, so I figured, "Why not?"
Well obviously we had a good time, and we were going to go out again, but January and February were probably the busiest and most stressful months of my life at work. SO it didn't work out. But he found a great girl and I'm so happy for him!
EXHIBIT C:
My sister Sarah texts me: "Alisha, I have the perfect guy for you! He's my friends' cousin's cousin." Or something like that.
Me: "Ok great! What's his name?"
Sarah: "Exhibit C."
Me: "I know him, actually! We went on a date when I first moved to Arizona. He is nice and good looking. I can't really remember why we didn't go out."
Anyway, he starts texting me that his cousin was trying to set him up with me too!
So we start texting. Right before Valentine's Day.
If you remember, February was one of my busiest/most stressful months of my life, so what do you think I did on Valentine's Day?
- I WORKED UNTIL 8:30 PM. Then I went for a 7 mile run by myself BECAUSE I WANTED TO.
Exhibit C wanted to come to my house and spend the evening together. Really? Valentine's is for couples/relationships/etc. Not to spend with an acquaintance!
EXHIBIT D:
I was chatting with my mom one fine Monday, when she says, "Oh yeah, I hope you don't mind but I gave your number out."
ME: "Um, what? to Whom? For what reason?"
Mom: "Oh, to Sister Knowlton so she can set you up on a date."
ME: "Ok. Can you please tell me about this guy? At least give me his name so I can FB stalk him?"
Mom: "Oh darn, I don't remember. I think he's a Doctor though in Arizona!"
Sooo Homeboy got my number. We chatted. We're going on a lunch date on Thursday. Thank GOODNESS it's a lunch date.
Rule #1. If it's a blind date - meet him for lunch and meet him THERE. That way the expectation is short and sweet, and you can ditch out whenever necessary.
EXHIBIT E: (I promise this is the last for now.)
Dating is EVOLVING ladies and Gents.
This Gem added me on Facebook. We had a lot of mutual friends and I thought he was attractive, so instead of adding him and letting him see my whole life, I sent him a message. Sure enough, we end up talking and flirting for about a month.
We finally meet up. (He's cute in real life too! Not just in FB world.)
He finally gets my number.
Two days later he asks me out. (I'm excited about this one!)
We went on a really fun St. Patrick's Day date. Tandem bike riding on ASU's campus and up Mill avenue during the Beer Drinking festivities. Got Oregano's for dinner and then biked by Tempe Town lake. Oh and we laughed and talked and flirted. A LOT.
And guess what? In real life he's fun, cute, and graduated from college in business. TOTALLY my type. and I'm interested. (which doesn't happen very often.)
Of course the next day I head out of town for the weekend and so does he.
And despite the fact that I was 110% sure that he was into it from all the work he had to do to earn my FB friendship and get a date, get this...
HE HASN'T CALLED.
Thank goodness my sister taught me not to be "THAT GIRL.
The other best piece of advice is to NOT CRY OVER SOMEONE ELSE'S HUSBAND. So I'm already over him. Exhibit E who??
So there you have it. My up-DATE.
As my Dad always says, "Onward and Upward."
Here's to Upward!!
5 comments:
i love this so much! so fun to hear about all your dating horror stories - don't worry about this last guy. there is still time. matt didn't call for a while. please keep these coming. i loved being involved in your dating drama. your lucky husband will be the neatest man! he's had a LOT of competition.
Man....seriously bro?! That is all just straight up ridonculous...haha Good thing you're freaking hot and actually get asked on some fun dates....free lunch is better than a punch in the kisser lol
sorry for the not-so-good luck in the dating arena, Alisha! but i enjoyed the way you wrote about it. way to allow yourself to laugh about dating annoyances! I think you're amazing and you look hot in your pics, if that means anything. = )
Hang in there...and you're right. One of these days you'll die laughing about the weirdos you dated and be seriously grateful that none of it worked out! In the meantime, I'll ask around with Kylan's two sisters that live in PHX and see if they have any keepers hiding away!
Best of luck, and thanks for sharing!
And for the record, the black and white shoes are fantastic!
Oh Lish! I just love you and I have to admit this made me laugh a lot because, pretty sure I could also write something like this :) Just this morning, in the middle of an eye exam, my optometrist asked if he could set me up with his nephew. So we'll see what funny story comes from that!
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